Japanese Giving and Receiving Verbs: あげる, くれる, もらう

Japanese giving and receiving verbs (あげる, くれる, and もらう) form a single three-verb paradigm. English speakers need it as soon as they want to say "give" or "receive."¹²

Japanese does not collapse transfer into one neutral verb. The speaker has to pick a verb that already encodes who is giving, who is receiving, and which direction the goodwill flows.³⁴

Overview

The three verbs are known collectively as 授受動詞 (jujudōshi, "verbs of giving and receiving"), or in classroom shorthand as やりもらい verbs.¹²⁴ They organize themselves along two axes: the direction of the transfer relative to the speaker, and which participant becomes the grammatical subject.³⁴

This article covers the noun-transfer use of the three verbs (giving an object, receiving a gift). The benefactive te-form construction (〜てあげる, 〜てくれる, 〜てもらう) attaches to an action rather than an object. It builds on this paradigm and is treated as a separate, later grammar point.⁵⁶

The three verbs at a glance

Verb	Direction of transfer	Grammatical subject	Default English gloss
あげる	outward (away from speaker)	giver	"(someone in-group) gives to (someone out-group)"12
くれる	inward (toward speaker)	giver	"(someone out-group) gives to me or my in-group"12
もらう	inward (toward speaker)	receiver	"(speaker or in-group) receives from (someone)"24

あげる and くれる share the giver-as-subject pattern. What distinguishes them is the direction of the transfer relative to the speaker.³² もらう keeps the same inward direction as くれる but makes the receiver the subject.⁴⁷

Why Japanese needs two verbs for "give"

English uses one verb, "give," and lets context show who is doing the giving. Japanese splits that work between あげる and くれる because the speaker cannot stand at an equal emotional distance from the giver and the receiver.³⁸

Susumu Kuno states the underlying principle as the empathy hierarchy: the speaker cannot empathize with someone else more than with themselves.³ When the transfer ends with the speaker or the speaker's in-group, the verb has to align with that empathy. That is what くれる encodes.³⁸

The Japan Foundation states the same rule in classroom-ready form: あげる is used when the speaker or another person helps a third person. くれる is used when another person helps the speaker, the speaker's family, or another in-group member.¹

Empathy is grammatical, not optional

The choice between あげる and くれる is not a stylistic preference. The verb itself carries the directional commitment. If you pick the wrong verb, native listeners hear confusion about who counts as inside the speaker's circle.³⁴

Where these verbs sit in the JLPT and textbook sequence

All three verbs are JLPT N4 vocabulary in their object-transfer use.⁵⁶ Genki II introduces them together in Lesson 14. Minna no Nihongo II introduces them together in Lesson 24, leading with the polite あげます / くれます / もらいます forms before the plain forms.⁵⁶ Makino and Tsutsui group them in the basic tier of A Dictionary of Basic Japanese Grammar.⁷

The te-form benefactive (〜てあげる, 〜てくれる, 〜てもらう) is delayed: Genki II Chapter 16 and Minna Lessons 41 to 42.⁵⁶

Form and conjugation

あげる: giver-as-subject, outward direction

あげる is a 一段 (ichidan, lower-monograde) verb. Its forms are regular: dictionary あげる, polite あげます, negative あげない, past あげた, te-form あげて.⁷

Particle template from The Japan Foundation: 私・他の人 が/は + 他の人 に + ～を + あげる.¹ The receiver is dative-marked (に); the object is accusative-marked (を).¹⁹

私わたしは妹いもうとに本ほんをあげました。⁶
"I gave my younger sister a book."

弟おとうとが友達ともだちにプレゼントをあげる。¹⁰
"My younger brother gives a present to his friend."

ミラーさんは木村きむらさんに花はなをあげました。⁶
"Mr. Miller gave Ms. Kimura flowers."

くれる: giver-as-subject, inward direction

くれる is also a 一段 verb, with one wrinkle: the plain imperative is the irregular くれ, not the expected くれろ.⁷¹¹ The kanji is 呉れる, but modern text usually writes the verb in kana.¹¹

The receiver slot is grammatically fixed. Wiktionary captures the rule in a usage note: "the receiver is always the speaker or someone in an in-group of the speaker."¹¹ This is a hard constraint, not a stylistic tendency.

Particle template from The Japan Foundation: 他の人 が/は + 私・ウチのメンバー に + ～を + くれる.¹ The に-marked receiver is dropped in conversation whenever it is identifiable as the speaker, which is the default reading.²¹⁰

友達ともだちが(私わたしに)プレゼントをくれた。¹⁰
"A friend gave me a present."

兄あにが弟おとうとにチョコレートをくれた。¹⁰
"My older brother gave my younger brother chocolate."

Both siblings in the second example are in-group from the speaker's vantage, which is why くれる is licensed even though the speaker is not the receiver in the sentence.²

先生せんせいが本ほんをくださいました。⁷
"The teacher gave me a book."

The honorific くださる drops the receiver slot, and the listener reconstructs it as the speaker by default.²¹¹

もらう: receiver-as-subject, inward direction

もらう is a 五段 (godan, consonant-stem) verb. Its forms are regular for that class: dictionary もらう, polite もらいます, negative もらわない, past もらった, te-form もらって.⁷

Particle template: Receiver は/が + Giver に / から + Object を + もらう.⁹⁷ The giver slot can take either に or から. Both are grammatical. から is preferred (and in some pedagogies required) when the giver is an institution, company, or otherwise impersonal source. に foregrounds direct contact with a person.⁹⁷

私わたしは田中たなかさんにプレゼントをもらいました。⁶
"I received a present from Mr. Tanaka."

私わたしは会社かいしゃから手紙てがみをもらいました。⁷
"I got a letter from the company."

The institutional giver in the second example licenses から over に.⁷

弟おとうとは先生せんせいに辞書じしょをもらった。⁵
"My younger brother got a dictionary from the teacher."

The receiver here is the speaker's younger brother, who counts as in-group, so もらう is licensed even though the speaker is not the grammatical subject.⁵

The politeness chain

Each verb sits at the neutral middle of a vertical chain. Moving up the chain raises the receiver socially or lowers the speaker. Moving down the chain reaches for animals, plants, and inferiors.²⁹⁷

Axis	Down / inferior	Neutral	Up / honorific or humble
Giver-as-subject, outward	やる (plants, pets, small children)	あげる	差し上げる (humble; speaker gives)
Giver-as-subject, inward	(no down form)	くれる	くださる (honorific; the giver is elevated)
Receiver-as-subject, inward	(no down form)	もらう	いただく (humble; speaker receives)

The plain forms あげる, くれる, and もらう sit at N4. The keigo forms 差し上げる, くださる, and いただく are usually introduced with 敬語 (keigo) instruction in an N4 to N3 band.⁵⁶⁷

Nuance and usage contexts

The in-group rule (内 vs 外)

The in-group (ウチ) starts with the speaker, extends to family, and expands outward to close colleagues. Everyone else is out-group (ソト).¹² A transfer crossing the boundary inward demands くれる (giver as subject) or もらう (receiver as subject). A transfer crossing outward demands あげる.¹²⁴

The boundary is portable. If the speaker's younger sister gives a gift to a Yamada-san outside the speaker's circle, the verb is あげる because the transfer is outward from the in-group.²¹⁰ If Yamada-san gives a gift to the sister, the verb is くれる because the sister counts as in-group from the speaker's vantage.²¹⁰

妹いもうとは山田やまださんにおみやげをあげました。¹⁰
"My younger sister gave Yamada-san a souvenir."

Office settings complicate the boundary in one specific way. When a Japanese employee speaks to a client from another company, the employee's own boss counts as in-group relative to that client, even though the boss outranks the speaker.¹ This overrides seniority. It is one reason あげる and くれる selection can feel counterintuitive to learners trained only on family examples.¹

Emotional alignment can shift the boundary

The Japan Foundation notes that the in-group is not always literal. If the speaker emotionally takes the side of someone they are describing, くれる becomes natural even where a strict relationship would suggest あげる. The speaker's empathy has pulled the recipient inside the circle.¹

くれる vs もらう: same transaction, different stance

Both verbs describe a transfer ending with the speaker or the speaker's in-group as recipient, but they choose different subject slots. くれる takes the giver as subject. もらう takes the receiver as subject.⁴⁷

The pragmatic effect differs. くれる foregrounds the giver's volition and frames their action as kindness. もらう foregrounds the receiver's getting and frames the event as something the receiver underwent or solicited.³¹² Kuno's empathy account explains why: with くれる, the speaker aligns with the receiver but marks the giver as the source of the favor. With もらう, the speaker still aligns with the receiver and presents the event entirely from the receiver's vantage.³⁸

Yamamoto reports that くれる carries a stronger affective load than もらう in spoken Japanese. Choosing くれる over a possible もらう alternative foregrounds the giver's goodwill.¹² One practical consequence is that ありがとう pairs naturally with くれる, because the gratitude flows back toward the giver-as-subject.¹²

あげる and the politeness trap

The textbook fix for using あげる toward a superior is the humble form 差し上げる (sashiageru). But the textbook fix is not always the right fix.¹³⁷

Makino and Tsutsui identify the underlying issue: あげる and 差し上げる both presuppose that the speaker confers a benefit on the receiver. That is socially awkward when the speaker is structurally below the receiver.⁷ Saying レポートを差し上げます ("I'll give you the report") to a boss can sound stiff and faintly condescending, because the humble form still treats the speaker as the one bestowing.¹³⁷

Saying レポートをあげます to a superior

Using あげる with the speaker as the giver and a superior as the receiver inverts the expected social geometry. The standard work-around is to convert the giving event into a receiving event from the superior's side using 〜ていただく or 〜てくださる. Another option is to omit the giving verb entirely and just name the action: お茶を入れます instead of お茶をあげます.¹³⁷

Subject drop and the conversational default

Japanese drops contextually obvious participants. With くれる, the receiver slot is almost always dropped because the verb itself encodes that it is the speaker or in-group.²¹¹ With もらう, the giver slot is dropped when context recovers it. The receiver, as the subject, is also frequently dropped when it is the speaker.⁴⁷

As a result, listeners reconstruct the direction from the verb choice alone. Hearing くれた means "to me or us." Hearing もらった means "received by me or us." Hearing あげた means "given to a third party or out-group member."⁴¹⁰

Recover the missing participant from the verb

When a giving-or-receiving sentence has no overt subject and no overt object slot, run the verb through the direction-and-subject grid first. くれる plus a dropped receiver means the speaker received. もらう plus a dropped giver means the giver is whoever the previous sentence introduced.²⁴

Good to know

Picturing あげる and くれる as arrows pointing in opposite directions

Both verbs share the giver-as-subject pattern, so the only thing that distinguishes them is the empathy direction encoded by the verb itself. A useful mental picture is あげる as an arrow pointing away from the speaker, and くれる as an arrow pointing toward the speaker.³² The arrow does not change which noun is the grammatical subject. It changes whose vantage point the speaker has adopted for the event.³

あげる originally meant "raise up" or "offer upward"

Modern あげる descends from Old Japanese 上ぐ (agu), a lower-bigrade verb. The "give" sense extends from the literal "raise up" sense. This is part of why the verb feels deferential by default and is now usually written in kana when used for "give."¹⁴

くれる is written 呉れる and lexicalizes the inward direction

The kanji 呉れる is rare in modern text, but the etymology is worth knowing because it explains the constraint. As Wiktionary records, "the receiver is always the speaker or someone in an in-group of the speaker." Choosing くれる is therefore a directional commitment baked into the verb rather than a choice expressed by particles.¹¹

Using あげる to offer a favor to a superior

The wrong form is the simple あげる sentence with the speaker as giver and a superior as receiver, for example 先生にお茶をあげます, when the intent is to respectfully offer tea to a teacher. The correct version drops the giving frame entirely and names the action:

先生せんせいにお茶ちゃを入いれます。⁷
"I will make tea for the teacher."

If the speaker wants to keep a giving verb, the humble 差し上げる is the textbook choice. But that form can itself sound stiff in service contexts where simply naming the action is more natural.¹³⁷

Using くれる where the receiver is not the speaker or in-group

A first-person subject combined with an out-group receiver violates the empathy constraint Kuno formalizes as the no-conflicting-empathy rule.³⁴ The wrong form is 私は田中さんに本をくれた, intended as "I gave Tanaka a book." The correct version uses あげる because the transfer is outward from the speaker:

私わたしは田中たなかさんに本ほんをあげた。⁴
"I gave Tanaka a book."

やる for plants, pets, and small children

The patterns 花に水をやる ("water the flowers") and 犬にえさをやる ("feed the dog") are the historically standard forms. Pet owners increasingly say 犬にえさをあげる instead. 文化庁's 国語に関する世論調査 tracks this shift as a marker of politeness inflation in Japanese.¹⁵ Either form is grammatical. The choice signals how the speaker positions the non-human referent socially.¹⁵

Three particles, one verb (に, から, を) with もらう

もらう takes に or から for the source slot and を for the object. The two source particles are both grammatical, with から preferred when the giver is institutional or distant. に cannot mark an institution as agent in the same way that から can.⁹⁷ くれる and あげる do not have this alternation: their giver-source slot is に only.¹⁹

What this article does not cover

The te-form benefactive construction (〜てあげる, 〜てくれる, 〜てもらう) takes a verb of action, not just an object. It shifts the social weight of the sentence in ways that go beyond noun transfer. It builds on the paradigm laid out here and is treated as a separate later grammar point in both Genki II and Minna no Nihongo.⁵⁶

See also

• The Te-Form Benefactive: 〜てあげる, 〜てくれる, 〜てもらう
• Asymmetric Keigo: Humbling Your Own Boss (Uchi-Soto)
• Japanese Verb Groups: 一段, 五段, and Irregular
• Polite vs. Plain Japanese: です/ます vs. だ (丁寧体・普通体)
• Dropped Subjects in Japanese: Pro-Drop Explained

References

Footnotes

1. 国際交流基金 (The Japan Foundation). 「文法を楽しく『授受表現』(1)」. 日本語教育通信, no. 78. https://www.jpf.go.jp/j/project/japanese/teach/tsushin/grammar/201409.html (Speaker / in-group rule; particle templates 私・他の人 が/は 他の人 に ～を ～あげる and 他の人 が/は 私・ウチのメンバー に ～を ～くれる.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸ ↩⁹ ↩¹⁰ ↩¹¹ ↩¹² ↩¹³ ↩¹⁴

2. 東京外国語大学言語モジュール (TUFS Coelang). 「日本語 文法 やりもらい：解説」. https://www.coelang.tufs.ac.jp/mt/ja/gmod/contents/explanation/085.html (Direction-of-transfer schema; in-group rule including family; politeness chain やる / あげる / さしあげる, くれる / くださる, もらう / いただく.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸ ↩⁹ ↩¹⁰ ↩¹¹ ↩¹² ↩¹³ ↩¹⁴ ↩¹⁵ ↩¹⁶ ↩¹⁷

3. Kuno, Susumu. Functional Syntax: Anaphora, Discourse, and Empathy. University of Chicago Press, 1987, pp. 203–212. (Empathy hierarchy; "speaker cannot empathize with someone else more than with himself/herself".) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸ ↩⁹ ↩¹⁰ ↩¹¹ ↩¹²

4. Mainichi Nonbiri. 「授受表現とは？(授受動詞、あげる、もらう、くれる)」. https://mainichi-nonbiri.com/jltct/benefactive-expression/ (Two-axis framework: subject selection and uchi/soto empathy; ungrammaticality of self-as-receiver with くれる combined with first-person subject.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸ ↩⁹ ↩¹⁰ ↩¹¹ ↩¹² ↩¹³

5. Banno, Eri et al. Genki II: An Integrated Course in Elementary Japanese, 3rd ed. The Japan Times, 2020. Lesson 14, grammar point on あげる / くれる / もらう. (Textbook anchor for JLPT-N4-equivalent placement and basic particle templates.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸

6. スリーエーネットワーク. Minna no Nihongo Shokyū II. 3A Network. Lesson 24, あげます / くれます / もらいます. (Textbook anchor for the same grammar point in the Minna sequence.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸ ↩⁹

7. Makino, Seiichi and Michio Tsutsui. A Dictionary of Basic Japanese Grammar. The Japan Times, 1989. Entries あげる¹, くれる¹, もらう¹ (pp. 63–67, 213–219, 261–265). (Particle templates, register and politeness gradient, comparison あげる vs くれる.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸ ↩⁹ ↩¹⁰ ↩¹¹ ↩¹² ↩¹³ ↩¹⁴ ↩¹⁵ ↩¹⁶ ↩¹⁷ ↩¹⁸ ↩¹⁹ ↩²⁰ ↩²¹

8. Kuno, Susumu. 『談話の文法』(Danwa no Bunpō / Discourse Grammar). Taishukan, 1978. (Origin of the camera-angle / empathy account for くれる vs あげる.) ↩ ↩² ↩³

9. 友 (Tomo Juku). 「授受表現（物のやりもらい）①」. https://www.tomojuku.com/blog/jujumono/ (Particle templates for あげる, くれる, もらう; politeness register chains; に / から alternation for もらう.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶

10. Tofugu. "Giving and Receiving Verbs: くれる, あげる, and もらう." https://www.tofugu.com/japanese-grammar/kureru-ageru-morau/ (Uchi / soto framing with worked examples 弟が友達にプレゼントをあげる vs 友達が弟にプレゼントをくれる.) (limitation) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶ ↩⁷ ↩⁸

11. Wiktionary contributors. "くれる." Wiktionary, the free dictionary. https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E3%81%8F%E3%82%8C%E3%82%8B (Kanji 呉れる; usage note: "the receiver is always the speaker or someone in an in-group of the speaker"; honorific synonym 下さる.) (limitation) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴ ↩⁵ ↩⁶

12. Yamamoto, Mutsumi. Agency and Impersonality: Their Linguistic and Cultural Manifestations. John Benjamins, 2006, ch. 5 on Japanese benefactive constructions. (Speaker-empathy account of subject selection across the three verbs.) ↩ ↩² ↩³

13. 国際交流基金 (The Japan Foundation). 「文法を楽しく『授受表現』(2)」. 日本語教育通信, no. 79. https://www.jpf.go.jp/j/project/japanese/teach/tsushin/grammar/201412.html (Common error: くれる cannot host volitional, imperative, or interrogative forms in the same clause as a benefactive request such as ✕ 手伝ってくれてください.) ↩ ↩² ↩³ ↩⁴

14. Wiktionary contributors. "あげる." Wiktionary, the free dictionary. https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%E3%81%82%E3%81%92%E3%82%8B (Old Japanese 上ぐ (agu), lower-bigrade > modern lower-monograde; "give" sense listed as sense extension, chiefly written in kana.) (limitation) ↩

15. 文化庁. 『国語に関する世論調査』(annual). https://www.bunka.go.jp/tokei_hakusho_shuppan/tokeichosa/kokugo_yoronchosa/ (Recurring item comparing やる vs あげる usage for plants, pets, and family inferiors; documents diachronic spread of あげる into low-respect contexts.) ↩ ↩²